I think a lot of people have a hard time being a friend, not that they do not want to be friendly. It’s just that they don’t know how. To be a friend I think that we should learn to assess the needs of the other person and then be to them what they need. It seems that quite often we think the other fellow needs just the thing that we have to give, merely because we believe that it is right and it works for us. Maybe this is true and maybe it isn’t, but we should be sure before we talk. Sometimes we are apt to talk at great length to someone, and have a sincere desire to be a friend within our heart, and the only impression we get across is that we are “preachy” and think we have all the answers. This isn’t true in a lot of cases, but if the one to whom we are talking thinks it is, then all of our effort is lost. Our good intentions somehow didn’t get through. There are many people who are lonely, people who know the Lord and people who don’t know the Lord. There are many people with heartaches--people who know the Lord and people who don’t know the Lord. All of them need friends, but not all of them know how to be a friend. Being a friend is everyday living, not just sometimes when you visit someone. Wives and husbands and children need friends, and being a friend is everyday living right in the home. A man comes home from work. Whether he has worked hard or not doesn’t really matter. He’s been away a long time and the time is twice as long if he loves his family. He comes home and he likes to have his wife “talk to his heart.” Sometimes this isn’t done with just words--it’s done with, maybe a touch or a look, or it maybe the tone of voice that carries the message. The tone, the look, or the attitude communicates more effectively than words. It’s the same with a man. He can growl or kick the cat, or he can be understanding of his wife’s needs. She’s had a hard day too. And it’s the same with others. We must learn to understand their needs. Sometimes there is more communication in silence than ten thousand words no matter how well intended they were. What people want and need is to know they have a friend, not a phonograph. I think this kind of understanding should be the aim of every Christian. He can tell others of Christ more effectively if he learns when to be silent and just be around, and when to talk, and what to say. Too many people have been turned from the church and discounted Christianity because all people knew how to do was talk. They didn’t know how to listen or just say, “How are the kids” Or, “Boy, I’m tired, how about you?” Or maybe just be quiet and be available. Their heart was in it, but they talked without knowing the need that was to be supplied. To be a friend is the greatest joy we can experience. To be a Christian is the basis of all life; but to share this gift of love with someone else brings a joy that knows no bounds. Being a Christian is not just going to church and singing songs, and listen¬ing to the preacher, and telling someone else what they should do, but being a Christian is washing the dishes, washing the car, going to work, cleaning the house, visiting the lonely, and just being a friend everyday.

A ring can represent God’s eternal love. It completely encircles—there is no beginning or end. And it is set with great beauty. It encircles the finger so that it will not fall off. It is sized so it fits individually. But it can be put on and it can be taken off. Even so, God’s love for us may be accepted or rejected. When we accept it, it is wrapped around us by His Word that it won’t fall off. “I will never lease thee nor forsake thee.” A ring is worn willingly, and if worn long enough, becomes part of you—it leaves its mark when removed. Let us accept God’s love and wear it eternally.

I love Him better every day. By this I know that my love is not only for God, but of God. There is nothing common about it. One becomes accustomed to natural things; and natural things fade, even the rose loses its luster and fragrance as it grows old. But the love of God grows in richness; it deepens with time and becomes more precious with knowledge. I love Him better every day. Once He was just a myth to me--remote and unreal. I had no sense of His love. I was sufficient in myself. Then I met Him. I met Him because I was persuaded that Jesus, who was called the Christ, had provided my way into the presence of the Father. People told me this and I believed the people. The people pointed out to me that the Word of God said that if I believed in Jesus, I was saved and delivered from hell. Hell, they told me, was a place of torment. I listened to the people. I did not desire a place of torment, so I confessed with my lips that I believed in Jesus, so therefore I was saved from torment. But I was forever fearful. Was my faith as strong as it should be? Was I good enough to be counted worthy to escape such awful torment? What if, in a moment of weakness, something should happen to me and I was not “prayed up?” Had I passed by that “last opportunity” to pray to God and ask Him to forgive me of my many sins? What if? What if? People told me I was to never miss an opportunity to “get on my knees” and pray to my Father who was in heaven and ask Him for mercy. My heart was never sure, I was always fearful. I looked to people to take away my fears, but they were only dulled for a moment. One day I thought about God loving me. Loving? Were my fears the result of God loving me? Other people who didn’t know God had none of the fears that I had. Yet I was asking them to give their heart to the Lord. Why, so they could have fears too? There was something wrong here. Love doesn’t generate fear. The Word of God declares, “Perfect love casteth out fear.” Who could be more perfect than God? If this perfection that was God was to cast out fear, why then did I have fear when I thought of God? I could come to only one conclusion: either I didn’t know God after all, or the Bible was in error. I could not believe the Bible to be in error, because on this point at least, I would have to remove concepts about the peace and comfort of love. The only thing left for me was what came right down to it. I didn’t know God. This was quite a blow to me, because I had been diligent in all that which I was instructed. I was faithful in my duties to my church. I was in active participation with the church programs, and I held my leaders and instructors in high esteem. Yet, I had to face it, God might know me, but I certainly did not know God. Jesus was my way to God. I believed that, but there was something unreal to me--I had never arrived. My lips prayed “Our Father,” but my soul could not cry, “My Father.” I began to seek God. I did not seek Him by seeking a different church or new friends or different circumstances. It was my heart that was fearful, so it was my heart that sought freedom from fear. It was my heart that sought God. I began to find out what faith was. I found that faith didn’t rest in the words of people, faith rested in God. God rested in His Word; so by knowing His Word, I came to know faith. I began to look at the Bible with new eyes. I had more or less looked to people for guidance, but this had never produced the results that would give peace and remove fear. Now I turned from people and looked to God’s Word. I found a difficulty even here. Certain scriptures that I had been taught to have a certain meaning did not seem to fit. They seemed to be isolated. They stood by themselves and did not harmonize with the rest of God’s Word. I found it difficult to clear my mind of its pre-set bias. But, as I did this, certain things came into focus that showed me a sure foundation. I saw the love of God! I saw it manifested in Christ. I had never seen this before. I had been taught that Jesus was the Christ, and that He was the way to God, but I didn’t see how or why. I knew the Scripture about God 1oving the world to such an extent that He gave His only begotten Son, but I could not clearly see how love behaved. I did not know God. I had always heard this, “In the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost.” It had beat upon my ears until it had lodged in my brain that there were three Gods. Then, when I had been told that these three were one and yet they were separate, I was confused. Truly, I did not know God. I began to see certain things in God’s Word. I saw the words of Jesus where He said, “God is a Spirit.” I saw where the Holy Spirit overshadowed Mary and caused her to conceive so that she would bring forth a child who should be called Jesus. I saw by this that God and the Holy Spirit were not two, but one. Then I saw a great error of the people. This is the error of all flesh. The people had likened God to themselves. They gave Him a form of flesh; therefore, He naturally was a person having form and tempers like themselves. Jesus told them plainly that God was Spirit. To be born of God one must be born of the Spirit. If I was born of the Spirit, I became Spirit. I began to understand how Jesus was made the Christ. One of the things that Jesus said to Phillip always puzzled me. “Have I been so long with you and yet thou hast not known me? He that hath seen me hath seen the Father.” This was in response to Phillip’s question. “Lord, show us the Father.” I had always looked at this with the understanding of my senses, and I reasoned thusly: Phillip saw a man and he heard a man. This man said. “If you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” Yet this same man that claimed to be the Father prayed to some power that was some place referred to as Heaven, and said, “My Father...” So with this type of reasoning, I became very confused. I had approached this point many times before, but I was always confused. I asked people to explain to me, but no one could, so I said, “It is not meant for me to know.” But now I had to know. Jesus was the Way to God and no man could come to the Father but by Him. I had to know. Then I began to listen. God was a Spirit. Somehow this Spirit was given to Jesus, so that it was declared of Him, “All the fullness” of God dwelt in Him. I heard Jesus pray to this Father Spirit to give Him the Glory that He had before the world was. He prayed, “Glorify me with thine own self.” This was accomplished. Jesus was never refused by His Father. Once He told the Disciples, “I will pray (ask) the Father and He WILL give you another comforter.” I saw what a wonderful assurance Jesus had. He knew that the Father would do whatsoever He asked. He knew that the Father loved Him. Jesus asked for us who believe Him. He asked the Father that we might be made one with the Father, just like He was made one with the Father. God didn’t refuse Jesus; so if I believe Jesus, I am made one with the Father. I am perfect in Him because I have been made one with Him. His Life is now my Life. All that the Father is, I am because I am ONE with Him. At last I have seen the way to God! My senses can not comprehend this wonderful fact. The flesh is overcome with awe at the tremendous truth of being one with God. Something within me says, “I see how, but I don’t know why.” Then Satan presents a false humility to me, so that if I harbor it and do not cast it out, it will rob me of all that Jesus gave. The thought that Satan would have me to hold is that I am not worthy of this honor. My teaching was that Jesus was always God, and He triumphed over the flesh because He was God. There was something that didn’t quite satisfy me here. Here’s why. When Jesus was baptized in the Jordan, He heard a voice from Heaven saying that God was well pleased with Him. Why? I can’t understand a God that says He is well pleased with Himself. But God was pleased with Jesus. Jesus Himself tells me why. He said, “Think not that I am come to destroy the Law but to fulfill the Law.” I began to think about this in a little less abstracted way than I previously had. I saw now that fulfilling the Law was a thing that pleased God. This began to fit because the Law expressed God’s desire for man. I had always been taught that the Law was a Law to the flesh, but I began to see that it was more than that. Jesus Himself stripped all flesh from the Law when He told us what was the first and greatest commandment. He said that this “Law of love” was the foundation of all the Law and the Prophets. This makes sense, because “God is love.” Therefore, His desire could not be anything, but love. Jesus fulfilled God’s desire so perfectly that God gave Himself to this man completely, so that it was said of Jesus, “In Him dwelt all the fullness of the Godhead…” What favor Jesus received from God! How great was God’s love for Jesus that He should give Him all of Himself! Jesus knew this love, He knew His Father. God gave all judgment to Jesus because Jesus loved like the Father loved. Now I begin to see “love at work,” the giving of one’s self to another. I could, in a sense, understand how Jesus won the love of God by doing the will of God; but in understanding this, I saw my hopeless condition more than ever before. I was born after the likeness of Adam’s sin, and God has concluded that all are under sin. What hope had I? I was bound. Everything that was in me was contrary to God because it was not subject to God’s laws. In my flesh dwelled no good thing. My mind was an enemy of God. God’s law is of the Spirit, and all about me and in me and through me is flesh. That is why I have so many fears; fears are of the flesh, and that’s me, born in sin and shaped in iniquity. But still, Jesus Christ is the Way. He won the love of God. He received God’s nature, and that means to me that He has God’s love within Him. The Bible declares to me that grace and truth came by Jesus Christ. I am also told that it is by grace that I am saved. What a wealth of knowledge this reveals to me! The grace of Jesus Christ reaches to me and because of His grace, not because of what I have done or not done. Just because of His grace, I have been lifted out of myself and placed in Him. Here is the answer to His prayer made manifest, that we should receive His Glory and be made perfect by being made one with the Father as He was made one with the Father. Jesus received His Sonship because He earned the privilege. God revealed Himself to Jesus; therefore, Jesus could say that God is a Spirit because He knew. Jesus tells me this, “No man knoweth the Father, save the Son and Him to whom the Son shall reveal Him.” Jesus asked the Father that we should have another Comforter. He said, “I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Comforter...” Then He said, “At that day YE SHALL KNOW that I am in the Father, and He in me AND I IN YOU.” So now I know the Father because the Son has revealed Him to me, and in revealing Him to me, has shown me my place in Him. He has shown me that I am made perfect because I am made ONE WITH HIM. My flesh still feels that I must in some way work for this position, but the attitude of grace does not include the labor of attainment. God’s Word declares that what I have is not of works, or perhaps I might boast. I have been given my perfection because I believe in Jesus. He told me to trust Him and He would present me faultless to God. Now I found that it is the grace of Jesus Christ that makes me worthy. I had my fears that perhaps God should become weary with me for my many shortcomings, but God’s Word declares that before Him I am perfect because He made me one with Him. I had my fears because not always did my senses rejoice because of the knowledge of God’s presence. I was fearful that perhaps I was forsaken. Now I rest in God’s Word and He says that He will never leave me nor forsake me. Fears! I will not own them anymore because God has not given me the Spirit of fear. All fears are of Satan; and as I see the perfect love of God, those fears are being cast out. I can not cast them out, but the perfect love that is my Father does the work. I was never fearful that I didn’t have a desire to come to my Father; my fears were of my own inability to be “good enough.” But Jesus said that He was my goodness, so I believed Him; and I just referred Satan to Jesus whenever he would try to sell me his line. I knew that my desire was to live for my Father, and I saw that His love prepared the way for me, so I live in His love, and I’m letting His love live in me. I know my Father, I see His perfection, and I am not afraid because “perfect love casteth out fear.” R

There are two kinds of love in this world. Let’s consider them for a moment. One is a self-centered love and has its roots within man. The other is quite different in nature and comes from God. This self-centered love could really be called a selfish love because it is very demanding. This kind of love takes all the attention and affection given, and cultivates that which brings the most pleasure and gives the most gain. This love causes a person to become cross and irritable when things are not to his advantage. Sometimes we call him a “poor sport.” In reality he is just the guy who wants his own way. Selfishness is just a self-centered love. It's a sorry thing to contemplate, but it’s a fact. We have become civilized, and have learned that it’s good to be charitable and always give the other fellow the “biggest piece of cake,” even though this makes us feel like martyrs. Then there are many people who feel pretty proud of the fact that they are so generous. Pride and selfishness are first cousins, and they are related to man. Then there is the other kind of Love. This is a Love that is completely forgetful of self. It’s a Love that says, “What can I give,” not “What can I get.” It’s a Love that is patient; it’s a Love that wants to please rather than be pleased. It’s a Love that knows humility because it has found a worthy object of devotion. This kind of Love comes from God. Of course, this is the kind of Love we all would like to have govern our lives. Naturally we want our families to know that this is the kind of Love we have for them; and certainly it should be the standard of our relations with our fellowmen, especially those we like. But, what about those we don’t like? What kind of love governs our attitude toward them? And what kind of love governs our attitude toward Jesus Christ? Do we seek His favor because we don’t want to die, or do we ask forgiveness of sins just because we want to go to Heaven? Or do we seek to serve Him because we see the great Love that He has for us? And in seeing this Love do we forget ourselves? Here’s a scripture that we all know, but let’s think about it again. Let’s measure our love for God by it: “Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.”--1 Cor.13:4-7. The Phillips translation gives the thought that this Love is not possessive; it is neither anxious to impress, nor does it cherish inflated ideas of its own importance. Think it over. It’s a good check point.

Never get the idea that strength is being able to interpret Love as a sign of weakness. Love is a sign of strength, not weakness. It is strength displayed at its best because it has subdued and overcome selfishness--a task that few have undertaken and even fewer have accomplished even in the Lord. Love is displayed by its unique capability of overcoming human nature. It requires no unusual spiritual manipulations to obey human nature which is to hate and practice greed; any human can do that; that is only natural for him. But it isn’t natural for humans to Love--that is Divine. Christ lives within us, unless we haven’t asked Him to come in; but if He is there, then all the Love of God is within Him and He is within us. We don’t think about that much though. That is because we are too busy justifying the reasons why we should hate someone. We have never realized the unlimited resources of the Love of God within us. We are willing to admit that God is Love; but in that respect, we would prefer to look at God as something abstract and outside of us instead of someone inside of us. That is because the expression of our human nature might be prevented and none of us would like that. We have never considered the weakness of human nature and the limitations of selfishness, but then that is because we have never considered the strength of God’s Love. The thing that is weak is selfishness. It is weak because it cannot face self-denial. It strives to maintain its cause and fight for its so-called rights. It never stops to realize that while it is asserting its rights, it is usually taking the same away from others. When that, which we call our rights, steals and denies freedom from those around us, then something is wrong with our standard of freedom. One thing about Love, it does not shrink from self-denial; in fact, quite the contrary. It perpetuates its freedom by such means. Not only that, it doesn’t feel cheated in the act. Selfishness insists on its own rights even when it is wrong and there is never a time when it is right. Selfishness knows nothing about the joy of giving; it is bound by its own limitations. Love knows no boundaries other than the boundaries its own integrity has established. It never loses its integrity because Love is not ego oriented. Man can know nothing of joy until he knows something of self-denial. Jesus was the most joyous of all mankind because He was the most unselfish. No one can know God’s joy until he has known some of His giving. It is only as we are willing to die that we will really Live. In whatever proportion we relinquish our hold on ourselves, in the same proportion we shall inherit the joy that only God gives.

The greatest privilege a Christian has is to think about the goodness and love of God! If we have truly given our hearts to the Lord it will affect our minds by changing the way that we think. The Bible says that we are to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, our mind and our soul. We cannot give our hearts to the Lord and then reserve our mind for ourselves. One characteristic of love is its effect upon one’s thoughts. If you truly love someone, that person will be in your thoughts day and night--that’s just the way love is. I remember when I first met my wife and fell in love with her. That’s all I could think and talk about. I told everyone I met about her and I still do! There is something about love--true love--that invades every area of our lives. Nothing is held back. Love’s commitment is total--complete! Could you imagine telling someone that you loved them--truly loved them--then go your own way and forget all about them? It’s unthinkable! Love wouldn’t do that! If you love someone, that love will permeate and infiltrate every area of your being. If we have truly given our hearts to the Lord, then we cannot allow our mind to do just any old thing that it wants. Love has now entered the picture and love can ruin your plans--your selfish plans. No wonder Jesus said that if a man loved Him he would keep His commandments, or do what He said. You see, love has a definite effect upon our minds and will--an effect for good! The Bible describes how love will behave in First Corinthians, Chapter 13. One of the things it says about love is that it “thinks no evil.” It also says that love is not proud or selfish. It talks about how love is patient, kind, gentle, and faithful. It says that love never fails or comes to an end. That love will never run out on you. Love keeps its word-- always! Love wants to please the one that is loved. Love will sacrifice the so-called right of “selfish expression” if it will better the state of the one that is being loved. Love always wants the best for its loved one. Love will sacrifice everything and anything for the object of its affection. Love always tells the truth and will not lie. Love is the most beautiful and unselfish thing there is because God is love. There is no other true love but the love of God. The love of this world is not true. The love of this world is based upon selfishness--on what it can get for itself. Its motive is wrong--true love always thinks of the other person. The true love of God is based upon giving, not about receiving. “God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son…” Love, real love, is always based upon sacrifice. It comes direct from the heart and is given voluntarily--never extracted. One must come to know the Love of God before they can truly appreciate what it cost our Father to give us His only begotten Son. If it doesn’t come from the heart, it isn’t real love. God started the whole thing when He gave us His Son. That’s where we really begin to learn about the love of God. But God didn’t just give to His friends--He gave to His enemies. That’s way over my head. I can’t even imagine such a love, can you? That proves to me right there that all my thinking is grounded in selfishness. I haven’t yet learned the love of God in all things, but I want to. Because only in the love of God is there true freedom and that’s why Christ died--to free us from the old nature of selfishness. The love of God liberates us from that old cold restrictive heart and makes it gracious, just like He is. We learn not to hold on to or be held by the things of this world. Only the love of God can change a person’s heart and make it the way He wants it to be. Yes, “If a man loves me he will keep my commandments,” because LOVE IS THE FORCE that keeps the commandment. That’s not just a demand, my friend, that’s a promise